The Kale Factory Blog

  • Soylent Green - The Authentic Recipe

    Experts have been aware for some time that in the future we'll all subsist entirely on a substance known as "Soylent Green". No, we're not talking about the absurd Charlton Heston feature, clearly a fantasy based on unsound science. For one thing, people aren't green. And secondly, it is a violation of the Second Law of Thermodynamics to suppose that an energy system could run on no more inputs than basically, its own outputs.

    That leaves us with the question, what exactly is "Soylent Green"? The original source of the word "Soylent" is said to come from another sci-fi story where the substance is described as a combination of soybeans and lentils. This is clearly incorrect, since soybeans and lentils alone are not sufficient for adequate nutrition.

    No, Soylent Green would have to be some formulation created by sound research and industrial processes that are only beginning to be developed.

    In fact, the primary component of Soylent Green, that is, Soylent, has now become available from Rosa Labs. Using the latest science, Rosa Labs has created a formula for the optimum combination of protein, carbs, fats, and other nutrients and additives produced with an efficient industrial process so as to maximize efficiency and delivery effectiveness.

    So Soylent has arrived. But where is the Green?

    Let's examine the problem logically. We have the Solyent, but not the Green. Where is the green to come from?

    Obviously, it is going to come from the most nutrient dense, high value green ingredient available. That would be kale.

    And since Soylent is made via a worldwide nexus of highly processed ngredients, synthetic compounds and hydrolyzed starches produced in industrial vats, it would only make sense that the kale used in production of Soylent Green would be kale grown by local famers, harvested by hand and dried at low temperatures to preserve all of the natural goodness. That way, you get all your bases covered. Local. Global. Industrial. Artisanal. Highly Processed. Natural. 

    Now for the first time, The Kale Factory has released the following recipe so you can make the real Soylent Green.

    1. Make a pitcher of Soylent.
    2. Add 200 ml of Kale Factory kale powder. Equals about two pounds of fresh kale.

    So the next time someone asks you what you had for dinner, just say "Soylent Green". And then look right through them... like you're seeing the future.

     

     

     

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